A Lawyers Favorite Attorney Jokes

Lawyer Jokes

Q: So how exactly does a pregnant girl know she actually is carrying another lawyer?

A: She’s an extreme craving for baloney.

Q: What’s the legal description of Appeal?

A: Something a person slips on within a grocery store.

Q: As to why did God produce snakes right before lawyers?

A: To apply.

Q: What perform you call an attorney with an IQ of 12?

A: Your Honor.

Q: Whats the difference between an attorney and a herd of buffalo?

A: The attorney charges more.

Q: What perform you contact a smiling, sober, courteous person in a club association convention?

A: The caterer.

Q: What makes lawyers want nuclear weapons?

A: If a single side has a single, the other aspect must get one.

Q: What perform you get when you combination the Godfather with an attorney?

A: An give you can’t understand.

Q: What perform you call an attorney gone bad?

A: Senator

Q: Did you hear they simply released a fresh Barbie doll called “Divorced Barbie”?

A: It includes fifty percent of Ken’s issues and alimony.

Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a pit bull terrier?

A: Jewelry.

Q: What’s this is of mixed feelings?

A: Viewing your attorney get more than a cliff in your brand-new Ferrari.

Q: Whats the difference between attorneys and accountants?

A: In least accountants find out theyre boring.


1. A man who was simply caught embezzling large numbers went to an attorney. His lawyer informed him, “Dont be concerned. Youll never head to prison with all that cash? Actually, when the person was delivered to jail, he didnt possess a dime.

2. As the attorney awoke from medical procedures, he asked, “Why are the blinds attracted?” The nurse clarified, “There are a fire next door, and we didn’t need you to believe you had passed away.”

3. God made a decision to consider the devil to courtroom and settle their variations forever. Satan noticed this, laughed and stated, “And where will you be likely to find a attorney?”

4. A lawyer is usually sitting in the table in his fresh workplace. He hears somebody coming to the entranceway. To win over his 1st potential customer, he accumulates the telephone as the entranceway starts and says, “I demand one million rather than a penny much less.” As he hangs up, the person now standing up in his workplace says, “I’m right here to attach your telephone.”

And lastly:

YOU MAY BE AN ATTORNEY If…. You are charging you to definitely go through these jokes.